PolySciFi Blog

Wednesday, April 20, 2005


Goats for Baal/Jonah

In the Corner, Jonah announced: "And of course as a Baal worshipper I shall bring goats and virgins for everybody [to Atlanta]!" But followed up with: "Alas, I've been informed by the airline that there's a no-carry-on virgin (or goat) rule. So, unless I can pick some up at the Circle K, we'll have to be satisfied with inflatable goats and flan for everybody!"

Well I think I can help out Jonah. This farm just outside of Atlanta offers goats for sale. Then these online classifieds offer goats for sale. While many of the goats in the classifieds are not close to the National Review get together, I'm sure that for the right price, they'll deliver.

However, I'm a little torn over the thought of helping Jonah in his quest for a goat sacrifice to Baal. Previously (spring 2000) I made and put up overnight (with a bunch of friends) some 500 goat activist flyers addressing such topics as (all are pdf's - if you want a copy in Word, email me):
Goat unemployment
Unsafe working environments for goats
Stop goat rape
Goats falling behind in internet usage
Goats lacking Congressional representation
Support a goat
The save the goats campaign (which also included several hundred chalkings chosen to reflect the interests of the building they were put in front of) caused quite a stir on campus, prompting letters to the editor, technical class room discussions (JP had apparently messed up the grammar for a chalking about goat illiteracy in Greek), and an extended two week discussion in a women's studies class that didn't take kindly to the goat rape flyer and chalkings.

But most importantly, Tim Lyon, whose birthday was that day, got hundreds of phone calls from people inquiring about the Save the Goat campaign - most of whom offered to help (I believe the offers were tongue in cheek - I hope).

There almost was a follow up campaign in 2001, focusing on the conflict between Llamabad and Goatistan over the Mohair region, but 9/11 happened and I decided that there would be too many people who wouldn't appreciate the joke.

So as a previous goat activist, I feel a little conflicted over helping along the Goats for Baal effort.

Or not.


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